538 AD
by Florencetheflowerfairy
Summary: Mimi brings Koushirou to the mall for a study session with bonus shopping, and she discovers that her friend is completely clueless on the current state of his love life. "You're a genius with facts, but you're really stupid with people." [Koushirou and Mimi friendship with implied Koukari and Joumi. Dedicated to Skuag.]


**12\. "You're a genius with facts, but you're really stupid with people."**

 _Dedicated to Skuag. Thanks for the great request, Sku!_

 _See my profile for the complete list of drabble prompts._

* * *

"What year did Buddhism come to Japan?" Koushirou asked. He rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet as he watched Mimi sift through a clothes rack.

Mimi frowned. "I don't know!"

"538 A.D.," Koushirou answered for her.

Mimi grimaced and pulled out a ruffled blue dress. She held it against herself. "Does it matter what year Buddhism came to Japan? All that matters is we have Buddhism _now_. What do you think? Are the ruffles too much?"

Koushirou shrugged, not knowing the answer to any of those questions.

"It's trash," Mimi answered her own question and hung up the dress.

"In 587 A.D., which clan took over the government?" Koushirou continued.

Mimi glared at the rows of silk shirts. "Stop putting me on the spot!"

Koushirou raised one eyebrow. "We have a history test tomorrow. You asked me for assistance. I agreed to come with you on your shopping excursion to help you study."

"No no darling! This shopping excursion is for you! I'm going to find you some decent clothes, and that will be how I repay you for helping me pass History." Mimi retrieved a forest green shirt and held it against Koushirou's chest. "Ooh, that looks nice on you!"

Koushirou looked down and blinked. "What's wrong with the clothes I'm wearing?"

"Orange looks _terrible_ on you. It clashes with your hair. Stick with green!" Mimi tossed the shirt in their shopping cart.

"Hm. If you say so." Koushirou coughed. "The Soga clan took over the government in 587 A.D. They were Buddhists. That should help you remember."

Mimi sighed. "I can't remember all these useless Japanese historical facts when my brain is already full of useless American historical facts!"

"Memorization is not that difficult. You have enough room in your brain," Koushirou said unhelpfully.

"Ugh, that's not how you sympathize with people." Mimi took a deep breath and her demeanor changed. She fluttered her eyelashes and clasped her hands together pleadingly. "Koushirou, can we please just cheat?"

"Hmmmm." Koushirou tapped his chin. Mimi watched him eagerly. "…You sit three rows behind me, so it would be difficult. I honestly don't know how we could get away with it."

Mimi dropped her hands and sighed. "Fine. I'll just fail then," she mourned.

Koushirou didn't seem to hear her. He looked over her head and his eyes widened, and a smile grew across his face. "Mimi, do you suppose that Hikari would like this?" He walked to a jewelry case and picked up a necklace with a silver cat pendant.

At first, Mimi looked annoyed at being ignored, but then she was grateful for the distraction. "Of course she would like it! It fits her aesthetic perfectly."

"Thanks—"

"But it's cheap!" Mimi continued. "If you _really_ want to show your feelings for her, you should _at least_ buy her earrings too." Mimi snatched matching cat earrings and dropped them in Koushirou's palm.

Koushirou didn't argue with the expert. "Thank you for your advice, Mimi. I appreciate it."

"What's the occasion?" Mimi asked. "Her birthday was months ago."

Koushirou shrugged. "She's always nice to me. That's all. She invited me out to dinner tomorrow. And she wanted to walk under the cherry blossom trees. So I wanted to give her something nice."

Mimi squealed. "Aww! That's so romantic! You're a good boyfriend!"

"A good boyf—what—?" Koushirou sputtered. Then he burst out laughing. "Mimi! That's the silliest thing you've said all day! And you've said a lot of silly things today."

Mimi pouted. "Seriously?"

"Hikari and I are simply good friends—"

"Koushirou, are you not aware of the fact that Hikari is truly, madly, deeply in love with you?"

Koushirou's jaw dropped. "Wait. What?"

Mimi rolled her eyes. "You know, you're a genius with facts, but you're really stupid with people."

"Hikari is in _love_ with me?"

" _Yes_. _Obviously_."

"But…" Koushirou shook his head. "I thought she liked Takeru. Or Daisuke."

"Honestly, darling. Why would Hikari want one of those _boys_ when she could have a _man?_ "

Koushirou looked over his shoulder. Then he looked back at Mimi. "Who, me?"

"Yes, you!"

Koushirou snorted. "I'm only fifteen."

"And very manly," Mimi insisted. "Did you really not know that she likes you?"

"People are so confusing!" Koushirou defended himself. "You call me 'darling' all the time. Does that mean you're in love with me too?"

"Of course not, darling. I call you that because you're my good platonic friend and I feel completely comfortable expressing myself with you," Mimi answered.

Koushirou opened his mouth to argue, when suddenly Mimi's phone buzzed. Mimi held her finger to his lips to silence him.

"Ooh, texts from Jou!" She opened the messages excitedly.

 _Hi Mimi. Good luck on your test tomorrow! I remember it was difficult for me, but I know you can do it._

 _I used stupid rhymes to help me remember stuff, like "In 538, the Buddhists weren't late." Maybe that will help?_

 _Don't you DARE think of cheating!_

Mimi scowled and texted back.

 _I would NEVER think of cheating! How DARE you insult my honor! Butthead._

 _thx for advice_

Mimi smiled and slipped her phone back into her purse. She turned back to Koushirou. "Anyway dear, you're just a boy and I need a man."

"What—but—you just said—!"

"But you're just the right match for Hikari," Mimi cut him off.

Koushirou stopped flailing. He turned downcast. "I don't know about that…"

"Why? Don't you like her?" Mimi looked alarmed.

"I don't know. Stop putting me on the spot!"

"But your DATE is TOMORROW! You have to know that!"

"Taichi would never approve of this," Koushirou cast around desperately for an argument.

"Taichi literally stood on the table at lunch today and announced to the whole school that he gave you and Hikari his blessing," Mimi deadpanned.

Koushirou blinked. "I thought he was joking? Taichi likes to joke."

Mimi shook his shoulders. "This isn't a joke! This is real, true love we're talking about here! Do you like her or not?"

Koushirou sighed. This seemed to be an awful lot of pressure for a fifteen and a thirteen-year-old. "I don't know. I'm pretty stupid with people, like you said. But…I do like her a lot, and whenever she's not around then it ruins my day."

Mimi smiled and let him go. To Koushirou's relief, she looked satisfied at his response. "Excellent. We're going to buy you the most stylish outfit possible for your date tomorrow. You will _blow her socks off_."

"Fine," Koushirou agreed. His head was still reeling. It was difficult to think. "Um. Um. What year did Buddhism come to Japan?"

"538!" Mimi answered automatically as she dragged him down the aisle.

"…Right." Koushirou couldn't even remember.


End file.
